Vol 4 Iss 5

Isn’t spring beautiful? I’m finally seeing green outside my window and it just leaves a soft soothing glow on the back of my eyes. What does it look like outside your window?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about birth and re-birth. My 36 year old nephew just became the proud father of a darling little girl. She’s a beautiful baby – looking at her picture makes you want to pick her up and snuggle up to her soft little cheek. Spring is the time for birth.

For me though, fall is the time for re-birth. There is something about the pulling in of the earth into itself that invites reflection. How can you re-invent your life? Many people my age are wrestling with re-inventing life after retiring. In the article below, I tell the story of how one person managed the process. He’s now in his mid-60’s and living a fulfilled life – but not in the way you might think.

I invite you to think about what re-birth, or re-invention looks like for you. What have you been postponing? What can you do now to prepare? I can help you gain clarity about what is a fulfilling life and how you can make a difference. Please call and schedule time for a chat about where you are and where you want to be.

My cousin retired a few years ago. He was a high school band teacher for 30 years and had the distinction of being the only bugler to sound the call to post for the local horse racing establishment for the first 25 years of their existence. When he retired, they replaced him with a recording.

He did the traditional retirement thing: full-time work then full-stop. This is the paradigm we’ve inherited from the previous generation, the generation that brought us Sun City outside Phoenix. In this paradigm, you earned your retirement by working hard for someone else then spent the rest of your life playing in the sun, or sitting in a rocking chair. By any definition you stopped being productive and rested on your laurels for the rest of your life.

That really didn’t sit well with my cousin. Being an active person, he did what most retirees do when their full-time work life is suddenly stopped – he took a trip. Going to England to see the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace had been a lifelong dream, so he fulfilled it. Then when he got back home, there was nothing else to do.

After moping around a while, he went back to school and got a Master’s Degree. This is where I began to see real change occur. Instead of pontificating about his opinions, he began to listen. Even to people who had a different perspective. Even to people who disagreed with him. Even to women. It’s pretty wonderful.

However, when he graduated, there was really no place else to go to use this new knowledge and new perspective. I don’t think he really looked that hard since the learning was the point, but now, again, there was nothing to do. Physically vibrant, smart, eager to serve. What to DO??

So guess what he’s doing now. He’s sacking groceries at the Piggly Wiggly! Now, this may seem like a bitter disappointment, a long slow slide into disuse and disrespect. No one dreams of spending their retirement sacking groceries. As a matter of fact, isn’t that the horror? So, when I last saw him standing on the loading dock at “The Pig” smoking a cigarette, I asked him how things were going.

Such a beautiful smile. The values around molding young lives that were so important when he was a band teacher are being honored every day. You see, the rest of the sackers are high school kids. He is a role model, advisor, even a sage to these kids. He demonstrates a strong work ethic and provides a helping hand and smile to the folks who shop there. He is relaxed, not overworked, and making a difference in the lives of his co-workers and the customers to that store.

All of his basic needs are met, and he’s honoring his values. That is the definition of fulfillment. You see, life is not what you have, or what you do… it’s who you are.

When what you do and who you are coincide, that, my friend, is true fulfillment.

You are free to use material from Moving Forward! in whole or in part, as long as you include complete attribution, including a live web site link. Please also notify me where the material will appear. The attribution should read:

"By Debra DeVilbiss, CPCC, of Forward Momentum, LLC. Please visit Debra's website at http://www.ForwardMomentum.com for additional articles and resources on creating your right livelihood."

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