Vol 1 Iss 23

This past Monday morning, bright and early, I started a new job at the University of Colorado, Department of Linguistics. My ulterior motive is to be in place to start an Internal Coaching program there, and even have an appointment/interview with Human Resources next week. In the meantime, there is much to learn.

I feel challenged by the new environment, and blessed to be in an office of laid-back, really smart people. This move honors my values on a lot of levels. The trick for now is to structure the rest of my life to accommodate a full-time job! Plus, I can't wear sweats all day. This is a radical change for me....

Because of my new committment, I will be writing a shorter newsletter this week. Rather than an article plus career tips, I am cutting to the chase and doing only a career tip and a poem.

Please let me know if you want the change to stay. Also, it would mean a lot to me if you would give me your thoughts on whether this newsletter should the shorter and weekly, or the same length, only monthly.

News from abroad is that my daughter, Anne Marie, is finally(!) out of Japan [4 earthquakes, 2 typhoons and 1 tsunami] and is now in Europe. Her first city, Antwerp, is so spectacular she tripped while she was gawking at the scenery and has been sidelined with a swollen foot. She tells me nothing is broken and if the swelling returns, she'll find a Dr. in Utrecht (The Netherlands). Find out more about the adventures of the World Smart group by following this link:

http://www.upwithpeople.org/pageinpage/2004studentnewsletters.cfm

I've spent a lot of time and effort teaching people how to go about changing their career, how to examine their values to find the grain in their own wood, and how to re-structure their life to accommodate a new livelihood. I also realize that not everyone listens.

So this week, I'm going to explain what it takes to fail. If you follow my advice, you will be certain to remain in a job you dislike, you'll be grumpy most of the time and more susceptible to catching every bug that flies within 3 feet of you.

So here are 5 surefire ways to stay stuck in a job you hate:

1. Believe the voice in your head. You know, the one that tells you "You can't..." or "You always..." or "You never..." or "What makes you think..." This voice reminds you of all your shortcomings and scolds you when you stray the slightest from the path it has ordained for you. The Gremlin (what coaches call this voice) has been training you so well all your life that you are not even aware that you are following its advice. Keep it that way.

2. Disconnect your brain from your body. When you are tired, push on. When you are hungry, grab a Snickers and a coke. When your body sends signals that tell you not to trust a person or a place, ignore it. When you are sad, or angry or upset, stuff those feelings - deep, and when they show up as back pain or pneumonia, blame your circumstances. The human body, science has shown, is a brain unto itself. Ignore it. (for more info, read The Molecules of Emotion by Candace Pert, Ph. D)

3. Stay safe. If you stick your neck out, your head will get chopped off. If you take a risk you will surely fail. All those examples of millions of people who grew and changed and did phenomenal things by taking a risk are just flukes. You know, people like Steve Jobs, Grandma Moses, Harlan Sanders, or my favorite, J. K. Rowling. That could never happen to you.

4. Keep focused on what you don't want. If there is not enough money, keep thinking about lack (so you can have more of it - "lack" that is) If your boss is a jerk, keep that jerkiness uppermost in your mind in your interactions. That way you can collect even more evidence to support your thought pattern. Don't ever, under any circumstances, focus on what is working or what you are grateful about, or you'd have more of that instead of misery.

5. Have lots of pity parties with friends who love you just the way you are. Sitting around commiserating is an important part of your life and you don't want to lose it. It's how you keep focused on what you don't want. And besides, if you change and grow, then your friends may have to face their own shortcomings and do something about it. You don't want to ruin a good thing, now, do you?

This is only a small sample of things you can to do stay stuck, but if you do them consistently, then all your dreams will never come true. Fulfillment will be a fantasy and you'll never make a difference.

If you need a partner through this process, call someone else. But, if this helps you realize you are living life unconsciously, PLEASE call or email me (at debra@forwardmomentum.com ) and let's partner on your growth. You have a good heart and you deserve happiness.

Nov 8 (tonight!) - LongNet meeting, Longmont, CO. A job seekers forum for networking and learning.

Nov 19 - ASTD/BAHRA SIG, Boulder, CO. "Holiday Chaos or Holiday Cheer?" We will be doing an interactive exercise exploring how we choose and how it impacts our life balance.

For the full listing of workshops, visit www.forwardmomentum.com.

You are free to use material from Moving Forward! in whole or in part, as long as you include complete attribution, including a live web site link. Please also notify me where the material will appear. The attribution should read:

"By Debra DeVilbiss, CPCC, of Forward Momentum, LLC. Please visit Debra's website at http://www.ForwardMomentum.com for additional articles and resources on creating your right livelihood."

PRIVACY POLICY: I never rent, trade or sell my email lists to anyone for any reason whatsoever. You'll never get an unsolicited email from a stranger as a result of joining this list.